Jelly legs

I feel weird...not food weird...just wrung out weird.  I napped like an infant this morning-nearly two hours.  I hadn't realized I was this tired.  I think I've done it again though--dealt with the logistics and necessary bits, and now I'm looking back thinking "ughhh... that was really bad and could have been even worse".  I think it's kind of like the long version of jelly legs after you have a near miss behind the wheel.  Once the adrenalin has left, and you've not had to fly or fight...it takes a while to recalibrate.

So today, despite Spanish lessons starting soon, I'm staying home to recalibrate.  I have quite a list of tasks to tackle, and I think that will give me the accomplished feeling I've been missing.  Although, when Jeff was in the hospital, he was accomplishing a great deal as he went through all the tests and recouperating.  The best result was that things would return to "normal" and now that they appear to be...it's time for new goals.  

When I was at the hospital with Jeff, I felt like I should be home with the kids, but couldn't be both places at once.  It was a really tough few days, for reasons I'm starting to realize now that the adrenalin rush is wearing off.  I'm going to be mindful of that, and make sure that I take care of my own health too, so I don't end up with a cold or flu on top of feeling all weird.

It's interesting to me that having a few intense days takes a toll...I really feel for people who deal with health problems on a more regular basis.  How they function, with all the emotional upheaval, and facing whatever they're facing, takes an impressive amount of courage.  Hat's off!

Now that everything is heading in the right direction, I think I just need to pause for a few, feel whatever emotions are left, and move along, remembering that we're fortunate to be together and well.  I'm moving on, with all kinds of gratitude, for life, for medical practitioners, and for family and friends who helped us through.  So, I know we're alright; I'm just not feeling alright yet--but I'll get there. 

Chao!